Critter Alley

Critter Alley

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Bear Balm



Hope those pesky bears can read!

It's reported by the San Bernadino County, California Sheriff's Department that on June 27 a call came in for assistance in regard to a vicious animal. Homeowners had returned to discover a bear in the kitchen busily raiding their refrigerator.

The bear left before authorities arrived, and no injuries occurred. Of note, however, is what the critter chose to eat. Tempting vegetables were pushed aside willy nilly in favor of a two-pound box of fine chocolates which was completely devoured. Then the bear attempted to top off the chocolate orgy with a bottle of champagne. Unfortunately, the cork wouldn't pop.

Can you imagine the scenario? It must have been a Mama Bear, stressed after a hard week foraging for food to appease a pair of rowdy cubs. She opens the door to the magic box of human food and finds...chocolate and champagne. Jackpot! Never mind the kids, this is for me, me, me!

I see this incident as proof that a binge of sinful eating to make ourselves feel better is not unique to the human world. I'm quite sure that Mama Bear erased a lot of woes that day, even if she didn't get her bubbly cocktail, sort of like me after a long day's work.

And being a smart mama, I do hope she found some tasty fish on the way home. Otherwise the scene would become a nightmare once the cubs smelled chocolate on her breath with nary a taste for them.

The only way she'd get any peace at that point would be to take the kids for a quick dumpster dive at the local McDonald's.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Do you think bears would learn to read phonetically or by sight? LOL

As for Mamma Bear---good choices, lady!

Anonymous said...

LOL! It may actually have been Tom, who looks a lot like a bear:) There is nothing that man will not do for chocolate:)